Little, big steps

Six months ago, I never imagined that I’d be somewhere else but Cebu. I grew up in Cebu and although I had dreams of living and working abroad, I never imagined that this dream will start to become a reality this soon and in these circumstances.

Last April, I met a very kind woman whom I never thought will be instrumental to this sudden change in my life’s course. We have met in a van going to Balamban. During this trip, we talked and talked, exchanging stories of our lives until we arrived in our destination. It was so amazing, how we’ve met, and I’m very thankful to whomever “set that up”. At the time we met, she was already scheduled to leave the country for a very personal reason. Since that time, we kept on communicating with each other – updating each other about what is happening in each other’s life.

Then the time came for her to leave the country. I felt very sad during that time because I was already beginning to miss her. I felt that we have already developed a certain closeness and I would certainly miss her texts messages, her voice and especially her whole person. However, we were still able to keep in touch through Yahoo Messenger and emails when she was away already. Thank God that we already have all of these “high-technology” modes of communication these days. They really bridge the gap that distance puts between people.

Days and weeks passed and one day, I decided to follow her. This was a very big decision, perhaps the biggest in my life. I felt I was ready to risk everything. To start a new life and a new career (as a chef), hopefully with her. So I resigned from work and waited for one month to be with her again. As I said above, it has always been my dream to go abroad to help my family and to save for my future. But this dream took on a different path because of her.

When the day of my flight came closer, I felt sad because I will be leaving my family, relatives, and close friends behind. Actually, it’s a mix of emotions – sadness and excitement. Sadness because I will leave people close to my heart behind and excited because I will be with her again.

The night before my flight, I packed everything that I would need for my trip. Later I just found myself crying because it dawned on me again that it will be a long time before I will be with my family, relatives, and close friends again. Realizing that I’ll be leaving very good persons behind who are my inspirations in life. I said to myself, “This is not just for myself but for them as well.” I wasn’t able to sleep well that night because I was sad and excited.

Then the day came for me to leave. My family brought me to the airport and when my departure time came closer, we all ended up crying. We hugged like it would be the last time that we will be with each other. Then I said my good bye to my family and thanked them for everything. And then I started my long journey.

When I got to my destination, I felt so happy and excited to see her again. I thanked God for a safe trip. And then when I saw her, I hugged her very tightly and gave her a kiss on the cheeks (hehe). I told her, “Thank you for waiting! Finally I am with you.” We went to her flat and she showed me to my room. Afterwards we ate “brunch” in a nearby restaurant because I was very hungry already by then. We went back home and then I took a rest from my very long trip (three changes of planes!).

I’m so happy to be with her. Knowing each other more everyday and swapping stories. Understanding our differences. Knowing the people and country more. Learning some of their language. What I also like about being with her is that we both like food trips. We both enjoy eating. We laugh all the time and I enjoy her company so much. We experience a lot of funny moments everyday as we explore the country and inter-act with the local people. She is very kind and accommodating. A down-to-earth woman despite everything she has already accomplished in life. Very sweet and caring, too.

I am so happy with this decision that I made. I don’t know what the future brings but I am happy with how things are right now in my life. She taught me about enjoying my present more and I guess this is one of the more profound lessons I have learned so far from her. We both hope that this friendship will eventually reach a deeper level but even if it doesn’t, I would forever be grateful that I have her as a friend.

Yes, I am a little sad also because I am away from the people I hold dear in my heart but I know I will get through this phase beautifully. I just say to myself that, “I can do this! God is with me.”

Six months ago, I never dreamt this far. But there is a certain gratitude that despite this sudden change in my life’s course, I am in a place where I am discovering new things about myself.

(This is a repost of my Friendster blog dated September 8^th, 2007)